Christian arguments against gay marriageIn this article I plan to write about the Christian arguments against gay marriage. Practically everyone in the mainstream media seems to be discussing why gay marriage should be legalized, but in this article I plan to offer my own Christian thoughts on the gay marriage debate.

My perspective is derived out of being the pastor of a Christian church in the rather liberal state of California, USA. I am a conservative, Bible-believing Christian. By that I mean I hold to a literal view of the Bible and believe it to be the sole authority in both life and eternity—for all people—regardless of their current sexual lifestyle. The Bible is the exclusive Word of God, without apology. The Bible alone provides God’s thoughts, commands, and expectations for marriage—which is between one man and one woman—and I am convinced it provides both clear and sound arguments against gay marriage.

Christian Thoughts on the Gay Marriage Debate

Does that mean that I or other Christians should hate, despise, persecute, or simply ignore people who are gay or lesbian? (That is, who willfully choose to practice a homosexual lifestyle?) Of course not.

Do I believe the Bible teaches that a homosexual lifestyle is a sinful lifestyle? Yes, I do. It falls within the realm of sexual sin, which countless heterosexuals fall into as well when they willfully choose to commit sexual fornication, premarital sex, adultery, masturbation, lust of the mind, harlotry, pedophilia, bestiality, internet pornography, etc. Yes, the list of sexual sin is a lengthy one and we live in an era today where the list of sexual sin continues to grow and the numbers of people involved in such sinful activity is increasing at an alarming pace.

It is February, 2014. Gay Marriage is all that seems to be on the radio, in the newspapers, covered by the local news, and voted on at both the federal and state levels of government. In fact, it even dominates the headlines surrounding college and professional athletics.

But the gay marriage debate (and homosexuality in general) is closer to each of us than that. Even for those of us who are Christian as well. Here are a few examples of what I mean.

  • I had an uncle who suffered greatly and eventually died of AIDS nearly twenty years ago. He lived an openly homosexual lifestyle in San Francisco, and the repercussions of his sin led to his untimely death.
  • Recently I went to Starbucks for an iced coffee (I really, really enjoy my iced coffee, by the way). There was a lesbian couple sitting by me at a nearby table. They kept touching one another, hugging, and even kissed once or twice.
  • Also recently, I was eating at a fast-food restaurant. There was a group of about a dozen high school students talking, just being kids. One of the boys said to his friends, “I can’t decide if I’m gay or just bi-sexual.”

These three examples demonstrate that gay men and lesbian women are all around us, that they come in all shapes, sizes and ages, and they are people a lot like you and me.

Christian Arguments Against Gay Marriage

Most people (including Christians like myself) have their opinions about homosexuality. Some people—on both sides of the gay marriage debate—are very open about their stance and rather close-minded towards those who don’t wholly agree with them.

As an example, a few of my highschool friends have unfriended me on Facebook, purely because I don’t believe that homosexuality is an acceptable lifestyle. They labeled me as archaic in my thinking. I was even an usher at one of their weddings.

The times are indeed changing.

The Bible’s Arguments Against Gay Marriage & Homosexuality

Does God care how people live sexually? Are there acceptable and unacceptable lifestyles according to God? Certainly people (like myself) have their opinions, but is there an objective right or wrong regarding human sexuality.

Some label homosexuality as merely a choice, a lifestyle. Others claim it is no choice at all but an innate urge they have had since childhood.

But where should the line be drawn regarding the definition of marriage? And who gets to decide what is right and what is wrong in the gay marriage debate?

For the Christian, we must listen to God by what He has revealed in the Bible. For the Christian, we do not bow the knee to cultural preference or even Hollywood’s latest interpretation.

There are some who claim that the Bible does not condemn homosexuality. In fact, the twist the logical interpretation of the texts to make it say something it has never said before. Such biblical misconstruists claim that the Bible verses (such as I list below) are cited out of context and really don’t condemn the loving, honest relationship between two people of the same-sex.

But is that true?

Are Christians completely misrepresenting the God of the Bible, as some say we are? For the most part, no. The truth is that the world wants to change God’s words to suit its sinful desires and the fact is that the Bible condemns both gay marriage and homosexuality as sin.

Bible Verses As Arguments Against Gay Marriage

Here is just a taste of what the Bible says about homosexuality, which provide logical Christian arguments against gay marriage.

  • Leviticus 18:22, “You shall not lie with a male as one lies with a female; it is an abomination.”
  • Leviticus 20:13, “If there is a man who lies with a male as those who lie with a woman, both of them have committed a detestable act; they shall surely be put to death. Their blood-guiltiness is upon them.”
  • 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, “Or do you not know that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, shall inherit the kingdom of God.”
  • Romans 1:26-28, “For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural, and in the same way also the men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men committing indecent acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error. And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God any longer, God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do those things which are not proper.”

God Made Adam And Eve, Not Adam And Steve

Homosexuality is not only condemned in the Bible but it also goes against the created order of God who made Adam, a man, and Eve, a woman—not two men, not two women—to carry out His command to fill and subdue the earth. Homosexuality cannot fulfill that command, physiologically. It is, therefore, an open contradiction to God’s stated design for those created in His image.

This contradiction is a severe one. And, unlike other sins, homosexuality has a heavy judgment administered by God upon those who commit it. This judgment is simple in that they are given over to their passions—which means that their hearts are allowed to be hardened by their sins.

“For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural, and in the same way also the men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men committing indecent acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error,” (Romans 1:26-27).

As a result, they can no longer see the error of what they are doing. They will not seek forgiveness. They will die in their sins. They will face God’s holy condemnation. But that isn’t all. In addition to the judgment of being given over to their sin, those involved in it also promote it and condemn others who don’t approve of their behavior.

That’s right, proponents of gay marriage will condemn other people who do not also participate or agree with them.

“…and, although they know the ordinance of God, that those who practice such things are worthy of death, they not only do the same, but also give hearty approval to those who practice them,” (Romans 1:32).

So, in their hearty approval of homosexuality they encourage others to be trapped in their sinfulness. They will not trust in Christ’s redemptive work on the cross. Without Jesus, they will have no forgiveness. Without forgiveness, they will have no salvation. Without salvation, there is only damnation in eternal hell.

How Christians Should Respond To Homosexuals & Supporters of Gay Marriage

gay marriage debateJust because someone is practicing a homosexual lifestyle does NOT mean that we cannot or should not love him/her, or pray for him/her. Homosexuality is a sin and like any other sin it needs to be dealt with in the only way possible. It needs to be laid at the cross of Jesus Christ and forsaken.

Homosexuality is not a special practice that is exempt from God’s righteous judgment simply because they claim they are born that way, just want to be free to love, or say that it is normal.

For example: All people are born with a tendency to lie, cheat and steal. Does that make it okay if someone lies, cheats or steals?

People want to love each other, but since when is the subjective feeling of love the determiner of what is right and wrong?

We Christians should pray for the salvation of the homosexual the same as we would for any other person trapped in any other sin. This is not an issue of arrogance or judgmentalism. We don’t want anyone to be eternally condemned due to their sin, and that includes gays, lesbians, or other proponents of gay marriage.

The person practicing a homosexual lifestyle is still made in the image of God—even though he or she is living a lifestyle of sexual sin. Therefore, we Christians should show homosexuals the same dignity as anyone else with whom we come in contact with.

Don’t ridicule them. Don’t hate them. Don’t ignore them. Tell them that freedom and forgiveness is found by faith alone in Jesus Christ alone. Let them know that God loves them and died for them and that they too can be delivered from the consequences of sin.

But this does not mean that you or I are to approve of their sin. Don’t compromise your witness for a socially acceptable opinion that is void of godliness and biblical truth! Instead, be kind to them. Be loving. And when the opportunity arises, share the gospel with them.

Can Homosexuals Ever Be Forgiven By God?

Remember, the Bible is our sole authority. God can save anyone, at any time, and from any circumstance or sin. And as the following Bible verse proves, remember that there are many Christians living among us today who were delivered out of that homosexual lifestyle by a most compassionate and loving God.

“Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God. Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God.” (1 Corinthians 6:9-11; underline is mine).

Praise God that He is the God of second chances!

QUESTION FOR COMMENTING BELOW: Do you agree with the Bible’s arguments against gay marriage, or what it teaches about homosexuality? Why or why not? (Leave a comment below.)

Photo Credit: torbakhopper via Compfight cc

Photo Credit: Chicago Man via Compfight cc

Reader Interactions


  1. Your article was right on point, and I believe wholeheartedly in what the Bible teaches in refernce to homosexuality. The overall acceptance of the homosexual lifestyle is growing daily, at an alarming rate. I was saddened to see that Texas, one of the most conservative states, is now faced with the same-sex marriage debate. A federal judge, has struck down the states ban on same-sex marriage. My question is: What are Christians doing to teach the WORD of GOD? Are we willing to compromise our convictions to fit into a society that upholds immoral values? Our children are being exposed to homosexuality at school, church, public events, etc., and if they don’t have a solid foundation of Biblical truths, they may fall prey to this lifestyle.

    • Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment, Sheri.

      Yes, the momentum for gay marriage and the homosexual agenda has absolutely caught fire. I am saddened to think that it is only a matter of time to see that marriage between a man and a woman will not be the only one recognized throughout the USA. Our world is changing so quickly. But that’s what Jesus said would happen in the end times. These things will take place “quickly.”

      Keep your eyes focused on the Lord, my friend!

    • Yes, I do.

      One question I ask lately though is are we clear on what part of homosexuality is sin? The homosexually oriented person is not inherently different than any of us born with sin (all sin being of nature). So, where’s the line? Is it the act of sodomy itself? For a hetero example, we don’t bat an eyelash if our sons and daughters are hugging in relationships or holding hands. And, it certainly isn’t heavy news to many people if he sleeps with the girl at some point out of wedlock, though we might agree that’s sexual immorality. But, the boy and girl themselves are not considered sin incarnate who cannot be forgiven. They have much leeway to sin and come back.

      A friend of mine is a mother to a just-out homosexual boy. It’s turned her world upside down. They’ve had to leave their church, and the boy feels he can’t be a Christian at all, like it’s not possible. She asked some good questions. Can a homosexual sit next to another homosexual in church if they are abstinent? Can they be in a committed relationship if they never have sexual relations? If they never physically touch? What if they decide to be abstinent roommates or get an abstinent civil marriage? What if they fail in a temptation once? How is this different than the unmarried boy and girl?

      Where is the line drawn? I think there’s a lot of confusion about that in dialog and communication between both sides on this issue.


      • You make some good points. It is for this reason why sin messes everything up.

        With regards to heterosexual fornication, that too is wrong and sinful. All sexual sin is wrong and should not be tolerated.

    • We as Sons and Daughters of God must be careful who we’d at the altar.Two adulterous couples getting
      married ain’t no better than two gays.As a Christian I believe they may have a legitimate point.I won’t marry a couple unless both are filled with the Holy Spirit.I just won’t do it, but preachers do it all the time and it’s unbiblical.Search it out.God is love but I do believe he allows certain aspects if life to go on to show our moral condition as leaders.

  2. Not to agree with what the bible says about homosexuality puts my salvation into question because having confidence in the authority of scripture is central to the Christian faith. I think it was Mark Twain who said it’s not those things I don’t understand in the bible that bother me it’s those things I do understand. The question about homosexuality came up early in my Christian journey in 1982 while I was attending Fresno State University. After reading Romans chapter I asked my bible study group what it meant that they were given up for refusing to acknowledge God in their hearts…being a young christian I was and still am hungry to know the truth. One of the young men in attendance piped up and said that if think it refers to being given up to homosexuality I was wrong but I responded by saying that I agree that I could be wrong but the bible is not wrong and it clearly states that refusing to acknowledge God in our hearts leads to being given up to doing things that are unnatural like homosexuality. Needless to say that young man stop attending our bible study.

    • Yes, that is so true, Jesse.

      We often paint our own misguided interpretations onto Scripture because we cherish things in our lifestyle. We need to let God’s Word say what it says, let everyone know: “Thus says the Lord!” and then apply it to our lives appropriately for His glory alone.

      Keep up the good work, my friend.

  3. I want you to know that it isn’t just Christians in the US who are struggling with this – on the other side of the pond, although we’ve had civil partnerships for a while, the UK government has recently changed the law so same-sex marriages can happen (the first will be in a few weeks).

    I too am ‘a conservative, Bible-believing Christian’ and – although I don’t believe it is critical that we ‘hold to a literal view of the Bible’ – agree that what is ultimately important is that we see scripture as God’s revelation of how we should live (i.e. what proper relationships with Him and with each other look like & how they come about).

    I cannot believe that this is what God wants for our society but, as a pastor myself, am struggling to explain just how dangerous any and all rebellion against God’s laws is. It is, of course, true that we all sin (we all rebel against God’s desire and plan for us) but I believe the crux of the issue is whether we want to indulge ourselves once our rebellion has been exposed (i.e. we’ve been convicted of our sin). Maybe, as pastors, we need to return to talking about true repentance – the kind that has nothing to do with being sorry, but which is about changed behaviour so that the individual doesn’t fall again – what do you think?

    • Thanks, Del. It seems weird that this issue of homosexuality is even an issue in the church at all. To me it seems pretty clear and straightforward that homosexuality is a sin. Let’s continue to pray for our churches!

  4. Stand to Reason has great resources for Christians who want to take a stand for God’s Truth and think clearly on the same-sex marriage debate. I’m going to get some resources for my apologetics class on this issue. There doesn’t have to be anger or shouting when discussing these issues with unbelievers, we can challenge them to think critically about their position on it and I approciate you having the guts to write on this issue.

  5. I loved your article and believe that you are absolutely right. The church has for too long tolerated too much sin in her midst. Odd how so many make homosexuality “the bridge too far” in terms of sinful behavior when in reality we are called upon to be spotless, pure, and holy which means the church should take a stand against all sin.

    That’s painful because we know we all have faults, make mistakes, and fail to live up to the divine standard, but that doesn’t excuse the church from holding the line at sinlessness as the only acceptable standard for which would should strive. I would be the first to stand up and say that it is a standard beyond which any man can live up to, but yet it is there that we are commanded to live. Thankfully, Jesus stands in the place of Advocate for all of us when we err and the Holy Spirit is here to give strength to our frailties.

    For the church to be the church, she must boldly stand against all sinful behavior.

    I would like to add one thing to your point about those who claim that they are born “gay”. For a person to be born “anything” it would have to be genetic. (I say this knowing full well that in reality the problem is spiritual, not physical, but I want to make a point about the absurdity of the assertion that a person can be born “gay”.) If we remove the “spiritual” component out of the equation, than the only possible way for a person to be born gay is for them to have something in their genetic coding that makes them that way. If that’s the case, if heterosexuality, homosexuality, and bi-sexuality are all genetically driven, then so would be all other “sexual preferences” including but not limited to things such as pedophilia, rape, incest, and bestiality. No one sexual preference could be excluded as being genetic, there could be no other causation.

    If that’s the case, and we’re willing to legalize, moralize, and sanction homosexuality then we must do the same thing for all other forms of sexual expression because their impulses, their preferences, are genetic also and thus cannot be helped. We have to open the jail cells and allow the rapists and pedophiles out of prison because they can’t help themselves either. Their preferences are just as “hardwired” in them as the gay man’s is. To even claim genetics as a “cause” for such debase behavior necessarily means opening up to the reality that we are unjustly punishing others for behaviors that genetically they just can’t help.

    I realize that I’ve probably been a bit clunky in explaining my point, but I believe that the accuracy of the logic within my argument completely dispels the myth that sexual preference is genetic in origin. It’s spiritual in natural, open and absolute rebellion against Creator God! It’s a choice, not a compulsion.

    May the Lord God be glorified in us all!


    • Tim,
      It is not only incredibly unfair to draw parallels between homosexuals and rapists, but just downright absurd.

      Homosexuality is not a choice, it is a genetic predisposition. Similarly, rapists and pedophiles are born with a genetic abnormality which causes them to be that way. However the important distinction between being ‘gay’ and being a rapist is that one is an aggressive act of lust, while the other is an act of love between two consenting adults. The innate impulses that a rapist feels are very different to one of a homosexual, as if the rapist acts on that impulse they will be sexually abusing another person against their will, likely traumatizing them for life.

      Now I don’t believe in the adulterous ways of many young gay people, but that is no different to any young straight people, or, for that matter, from older straight people (affairs and divorce!). The context we are talking about here is gay marriage, which merely involves two people who want to spend the rest of their life together in a committed relationship. Like every other imperfect person in this world (as noone is free of sin however much we strive towards it) they should be allowed that right to live freely.

      • Rachel,
        First, you indicate your belief (opinion) that gay people are essentially “born that way” but reality is that there is no proof that sexual preference is a part of our genetic makeup. It is certainly what a lot of so called experts, psychologists, and other proponents of the LGBT lifestyle claim, but that doesn’t make it true. It’s part of the delusion (the lie) surrounding homosexuality that Satan, the father of lies, would like the world to believe.
        But let’s think about something here for a minute, if you were correct, if behavior were driven by genetics, and genetics basically alone, then none of us would have a choice about how we live, what we believe, what we do, how we do it, etc. The absurdity of such a claim, that an action is driven not by a choice but by a compulsion of genetics then makes your last statement completely untenable as well:
        [quote]they should be allowed that right to live freely[/quote]
        If we cannot by reason of thought and mind make our own decisions on how we behave, then none of us are “free” to do anything. Everything is essentially already decided by the programming of our DNA.
        The true issue is that wicked mankind wants it both ways…he wants to be free to do as he pleases…but then wants to claim that he has no choice but to do and to be who and “how” he is. That is oxymoronic thinking of a sort that only a deceived mind can accept.
        God created us free creatures. Our physical forms are controlled by our DNA not our thoughts nor our decisions. Evolutionary thinking allows for “my DNA made me do it “thinking not God’s word.
        Lastly, if you believe that DNA controls actions, then I can’t help believing that…the Bible is God’s Word, that it is without error or repentance, it’s the authority over all authorities, the lone light of truth in the darkness of sin and deception. I can’t help believing that because…it’s in my DNA. So, if your premise is correct, than it’s just as wrong for you to ridicule me for my “beliefs” as it is for a Christian to claim that the choice of LGBT is sinful. I simply can’t help myself, it’s out of my control.

        • Tim,
          Firstly I don’t mean to ridicule you for your beliefs and I’m sorry if I left you with that impression. You have left very articulate and well-thought-out messages and I really respect you for that.

          However, my issue is with how you are defining gay people and your unfair comparisons with rapists.

          It is tricky to know exactly the role that DNA plays – and a completely different debate altogether – but there is no denying that it does have a tremendous influence on who we are. I am not arguing that behaviour is driven solely by genetics, or that DNA controls actions. (I believe that it is the choices that we make that truly define who we are – despite all our genetic predispositions). I am arguing that gay people were born with that attraction for the same-sex, regardless of their decision to act on that attraction. This is similar to any kind of preference. For example a preference for apples over oranges (a trivial example I know! But sexual preference is conceptually no different). One can always control whether they actually eat an apple or an orange, but not what they want.

          Now I think we can both agree (maybe?) on the fact that before a homosexual man has acted on his compulsions he has not yet contravened what you consider to be the teachings of the Bible. But where do we draw the line? If two men were in a committed, but platonic, relationship, would you consider that sinful? Before a man does lie with another man, before he does commit sin, he will still have an innate attraction for another man. It is this attraction that is “being born gay.” Whether he decides to act on this attraction is a completely different issue.

          The point I was trying to make in regards to my final statement – that they should “live freely” – is that I believe that homosexuals should be able to act on this attraction. I believe homosexuals should be able to live the lifestyle that they choose to (and above all the lifestyle that makes them happy), particularly if they have secular leanings. Why should they adopt a lifestyle that they don’t believe in, purely for the reason that you don’t agree with it? Everyone should be free to express themselves how they wish – as long as it does not hurt anyone else. Ultimately, what I take from the Bible is love the lord and love thy neighbour. If my neighbour wants to marry someone with who they are in a committed and loving relationship with, I want them to.

          Yes it is my “opinion” that gay people are born that way. We are only talking about opinions here. Religion itself is an opinion, an opinion about how we understand the world and how it came to be.

    • Ashley,

      Why are you gay? And, how is it “who [you] are”?

      Are you just angry because we have differing views of what is morally right and wrong? Or do you have an actual argument you’d like to bring to the table?

      I sincerely want to know what triggered such a response from you on this topic. I’m willing to open a sincere dialog with you about this issue and hope that you are willing to do so respectfully with me as well.

      I want you to know that I have and hold nothing against you personally. I care deeply about your well being and want you to live a full and beautiful life.

      May the Lord of Peace and Mercy grant us all wisdom and understand in the Light of His Truth.

      Pas. Tim Kinder

  6. We as Sons and Daughters of God must be careful who we’d at the altar.Two adulterous couples getting
    married ain’t no better than two gays.As a Christian I believe they may have a legitimate point.I won’t marry a couple unless both are filled with the Holy Spirit.I just won’t do it, but preachers do it all the time and it’s unbiblical.Search it out.God is love but I do believe he allows certain aspects of life to go on to show our moral condition as leaders.

  7. Christians don’t have OPINIONS about homosexuality. We go by what GOD said about it and GOD considers it a sin and said through the mouth of his Prophet(s) that they which practice such things would not inherit the Kingdom of Heaven. We go by GOD’S TRUTH, not OUR OWN OPINIONS. That’s a misconception. If you live by your own opinions concerning the things of God, why are you a Christian at all?

    • But religion is an opinion. It is an opinion of how the world came to be, an opinion of how to live your life. Everything that is based on the bible, is an opinion.
      Not to mention that there are so many different interpretations of the bible. Not everything is as black and white as you say it is. We live by our opinions of what we consider God’s truth to be.
      Are you claiming that a Christian who interprets the bible in a way different to you is not really a Christian? That their unique understanding of God’s words somehow negates their faith?
      That is just ridiculous. A Christian’s spiritual relationship with God is very personal, and their faith cannot be judged by others, not even sanctimonious over-pious nutcases like yourself.
      Sometimes it can be very difficult to determine where God’s words start and our own words end, but that is something we all must work on. None of us are perfect or free of sin, but we must do our best.

  8. Genetics do play a strong role. The x y imbalance does play a part in how one may think or perceive. Trying to tag God or religion to this is absolutely ignorant to health and science. There are some who chose to be gay without no imbalance then there are those who were different from birth. I’ve witness this with my own eyes.We should love and accept with no judgement.